The Many Faces of Facebook: An Open Letter to Christians Who Use Social Networks

There are tons of blogs and articles on the good, the bad, and the ugly of Facebook statuses out there; just ask Google about it.  So why am I bothering to offer my perspective on the issue?  Well, it’s not that I think I can add any new information to the conversation.  However, I would like to address this issue from a Christian perspective, and in particular, I’d like to address it to my Christian friends.

With over 900 million users, Facebook has become one of the world’s largest cyber gathering places.  It’s a great way to share information, to voice opinions, to have conversations, to promote people/places/things, to stay in touch with long-distance friends, and to connect with people we’ve never met face-to-face.  Expressing oneself requires only a few keystrokes and the click of a mouse.  But like anything else inanimate, Facebook is a tool that can be used for good or ill.

James, the half-brother of Jesus, knew how dangerous our speech could be.  Close to 2,000 years ago, he wrote, “It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell” (James 3:5-6, MSG).  The principle carries over to the written word as well, perhaps even more so.  Once something is put down on “digital paper,” it’s pretty hard to take back.

Facebook got its name from the book with students’ pictures, names, and basic information which some colleges and universities hand out at the beginning of the academic year to help their student body get to know one another.  But sometimes when I read certain status updates, I wonder if people have inadvertently wandered in from other sites.  Below are seven “alternate” Facebook sites all Christians need to avoid.  (I picked the number seven because it’s Biblical—yes, that’s said with a wink.)

Firstbook.  Firstbook is especially popular in the small town/rural community.  The members of this social networking site love to be the people with the latest 411, especially if the news is particularly tragic.  If they hear that someone’s Aunt Lucy passed, or so-and-so’s son got busted for pot, or what’s-his-name got in a serious car accident, their fingers will lock up if they don’t hit the keyboard within 5 seconds to let everyone else know that they were the first to know.  Sometimes this will be disguised in obscure terms, like, “Praying hard right now” (see Vaguebook below), so that they can justify leaking the information out when someone comments with, “Why?  What’s going on?”  Often their Firstbook cronies will know all the gory details before immediate family members of the person(s) involved do.  This is really insensitive, especially in the event of someone’s death.  If I lose a loved one, the last place I want to hear about it is from some distant acquaintance’s status update.

Rebook.  (No, not the shoe brand, that’s Reebok.)  This site offers a vast smorgasbord of items for its uninspired and unoriginal subscribers to pass on to others.  Now don’t get me wrong, I appreciate something being passed on if it’s thought-provoking, newsworthy, insightful, or humorous.  If you find something interesting, by all means, pass it on.  (But really, folks, there has to be a limit to talking cat pictures and snarky “greeting card” covers, right?)  The really annoying ones I’m talking about here are the reposts telling me if I love Jesus, world peace, baby seals, tofu, etc., I, too, will repost this information.  The absolute worst are the ones that claim a prayer will be answered, an angel will get its wings, world hunger will be solved, etc., if I share it.  These people should be thankful I don’t pass these on; otherwise, God might indeed answer my prayer and they’d no longer have the capability of polluting my newsfeed with such posts.

Vaguebook.  Vaguebook is the information superhighway’s gathering place for people silently screaming for attention.  You know the type.  They’ll post something like, “Ticked off! >.<” “What comes around goes around,” or “Words can’t convey how I feel right now.”  Their Facebook friends will gather over said status update and scratch their heads as they wonder what this post is all about.  Meanwhile, the original poster is dying a slow death inside as they watch their baited line float along the currents of the newsfeed.  Then, that first comment finally appears:  “Everything all right?”  “Can I do anything for you?”  “What’s wrong?”  With the hook set and feeling validated/loved, the Vaguebooker will then open the floodgates on the unsuspecting but compassionate inquirer.

Inyourfacebook.  The passive-aggressive set have made Inyourfacebook a cyberspace success.  Here is where people can unload on others with relative impunity.  Got a beef with your next-door neighbor?  Your boss?  The school board?  That rude checker at Wal-Mart?  Someone else’s bratty kid?  No problem!  Log in and give them a good what-for so everyone can see just how mad you are and how you aren’t scared to show it.  Cool thing is, you can do this all from the relative safety of your La-Z-Boy, and if the target of your ire gets offended, there’s nothing that says you have to answer that angry knocking at your door.

Blackbook.  No, this isn’t a site to store all the contact information of your past loves.  Blackbook is where people go to suck the joy out of all others.  Every status update from them is a complaint, a grim observation, or a dark cloud seeking to rain on everyone else’s parade.  Some people, like me, are pessimistic by nature, but the Blackbookers revel in spreading their gloom to all corners of the global community.  Don’t try to cheer these folks up, either; they seek not comfort, but company, for their misery.

Foulbook.  The ESRB has rated this site “M” for mature, meaning that status updates from Foulbook’s subscribers may contain “intense violence, blood and gore, sexual content and/or strong language.”  (I take issue with the “mature” and “adult” ratings of the ESRB.  Exactly how mature or adult is a person who consistently reduces the English language to crude profanity and talks incessantly about inappropriate subject matter?)  Foulbook, sometimes called “F-book” for obvious reasons, is where you can find statuses filled with cursing, shared images one step removed from outright pornography, and constant glorying in ungodly behavior.  “Tied one on last night, it was great, lol.”  “That @#%&$* better watch out for me.”

“Check out the (insert body part here) on this hottie!”  “@#$#%#$ #$%#$%^ !@#^*% #$%#$%!!!!”  Foulbook makes NetNanny dial 911.

Samebook.  Samebook is where Christians go to blend in with the culture around them.  Nothing about their status updates, interests, or likes would make anyone suspect them of being a Christian.  This makes it a haven for those who don’t want to offend anyone, who believe “religion” is a private matter not to be shared in the marketplace of ideas, who are more worried about what people think about them than they are the final destination of those same people.  Often the argument Samebookers will make is this:  “If I’m sneaky about my faith, then I’ll eventually be accepted by those in the culture around me.  Then I can share my faith.”  But that moment of sharing never comes.  There’s too much of a price to be paid.  People might think you’re a kook.  They might mock you.  They might even unfriend you.  That’s why Samebook will always come free of charge.  Don’t get me wrong; I’m not advocating a cyberChristian ghetto like Faithbook or Christbook (yes, these sites exist), where Christians only hang out with other Christians and talk about their latest witness wear purchases.  We need to be engaged in the culture around us.  But if all we do is mingle with those around us and never show the distinguishing marks of being a Christ follower, what’s the point?

Do your posts look like they belong on any of these sites rather than Facebook?

If you’re feeling a little put-upon by this blog, I’d like to encourage you with this confession.  I have to admit that it’s somewhat embarrassing for me to share this.  There have been times when my status updates look like they could have come from a great many of these sites themselves.  I’m a recovering abuser of my Facebook opportunities, and I still fall from time to time.  So I don’t come to this issue from on high with an outstretched index finger of condemnation (please ignore my humorous-to-me profile picture as you reflect on this), but as a partner in brokenness seeking to soften my sharp edges along with yours.

Here’s a simple acronym I came across several years ago that can help all of us in our quest to make the most of our Facebook posts.  It was originally intended for our speech, but it crosses over into status updates and tweets as well.  I don’t know where it originated from, so I can’t give credit; if anyone knows the primary source, please post a comment below.

T.H.I.N.K. before you post.

T – Is what you’re about to post TRUE?

H – Is what you’re about to post HELPFUL?

I – Is what you’re about to post INSPIRING?

N – Is what you’re about to post NECESSARY?

K – Is what you’re about to post KIND?

These are not easy standards with which to approach social networking.  Often a post can be true but not helpful, necessary but not kind, or kind but not true.  But if we can filter our posts through this grid, I think we will find the quality of our status updates markedly improved.  

Facebook is not just a pastime; it’s a tremendous tool, and like any tool, it can be used for good or for ill.  Above all, Facebook, just like any other expression of our identity, ought to point people to the person and work of Jesus Christ.  Let’s do our best to make the most of it.  “Be gracious in your speech. The goal is to bring out the best in others in a conversation, not put them down, not cut them out” (Colossians 4:6, MSG).  Blessings!